Want to know the number one thing holding you back from e-Course success?
This is going to sound harsh…… but sweetie it’s you! But not the way you think.
It’s not because you aren’t smart enough or expert enough.
And it’s not because you aren’t experienced enough, high profile enough, or thin enough. (Yep, I’ve heard all those reasons — including that last one — multiple times.)
The actual reason is because you keep telling yourself lies to keep yourself small.
Because you are not willing to be brave.
And just because, let’s face it, you can never have too much Liz Gilbert (can I call her Liz??) or Big Magic
I’ve watched far too many brilliant and gifted female creators say, “I am 99.8 percent qualified for this task, but until I master that last smidgen of ability, I will hold myself back, just to be on the safe side.”
Now, I cannot imagine where women ever got the idea that they must be perfect in order to beloved or successful. (Ha ha ha! Just kidding! I can totally imagine: We got it from every single message society has ever sent us. Thank, all of human history!) But we women must break this habit in ourselves – and we are the only ones who can break it.
We must understand that the drive for perfectionism is a corrosive waste of time, because nothing is ever beyond criticism. No matter how many hours you spend attempting to render something flawless, somebody will always be able to find fault with it. (There are people out there who still consider Beethoven’s symphonies a little bit too, you know, loud.)
At some point, you really just have to finish your work and release it as is – if only so that you can go on to make other things with a glad and determined heart.
Which is the entire point.
Or should be.
When I get emails during my launch for the e-Course Launch Formula, the vast majority of them aren’t questioning me or the program… They’re actually questioning *themselves*. Can I really do this? Is my business really ready? Am I kidding myself that people would want to learn from me?
There are numerous reasons for these doubts such as their expertise, time, finances, technical aptitude and more.
But in essence, they all highlight the same thing. They highlight the struggle women have with being brave, trusting themselves, and backing themselves — even when it is something they really want.
Our responses to these emails are rarely about the program per se, but about showing these women how capable they are and how we will support them to make their dream a reality.
They are about helping these women move beyond their own self-doubt.The key issue with women who want to create e-Courses but who never seem to do it, is confidence. Click To Tweet
Confidence to take a chance, to step up, to speak their truth, to invest in themselves and to finally take action.
Fear that they are not good enough, popular enough, smart enough.
That they don’t have enough expertise.
And this seems to be a particularly female issue.
Reshma Saujani in her TedEx talk “Teach girls bravery not perfection” states:
“An HP report found that men will apply for a job if they meet only 60% of the qualifications. But women? Women will apply only if they meet 100% of the qualifications. 100%! This study is usually invoked as evidence that women need a little more confidence. But I think it’s evidence that women have been socialized to aspire to perfection and are overly cautious. Even when we’re ambitious and we “lean in”, that socialization of perfection has caused us to take fewer risks in our careers.”
Saujani goes onto say this most important thing:
“Our economy is being left behind on all the innovation and problems women would solve if they were socialized to be brave instead of socialized to be perfect”.
As a perfectionist myself, I’ve been there. I’ve had crippling fear.
I put off going to my first pilates class for weeks even though I seriously needed it, because I was anxious about not being “good” (read perfect) at it first go.
I’ve had so many times times in my life that I told myself I wasn’t good enough and that my creations wouldn’t be perfect enough.
Like, I always wanted to live in London for a year and travel Europe. But you know what? I never did because I was scared. I wish I could go back to age 20-25 and do that before meeting my husband. I’ll never be able to have that experience now. (You can bet I’ll vicariously live through my children and encourage to have the ‘Aussie in London’ and Europe backpacker experience!) All because I didn’t think I could do it.
In recent years I’ve held back from applying for entrepreneurial awards thinking I wasn’t enough only to be a finalist when I did finally apply (and have my program showcased to a room full of people on the awards night!).
I almost didn’t moved forward in my business because of my unhappiness with my weight and fear of what others would think of me. But I did and I tripled my revenue that year.
I’ve sat on a plane in the middle of the night on the way to film in Canada and asked myself Who the hell do you think you are to do this?! You can probably imagine the cruel things my inner critic kept saying to me over the 16 hour flight!
Five years ago, when I created the e-Course Launch Formula, I had created around four of my own e-Courses. I’d had less than 50 people enroll in my programs. I didn’t feel like an expert, there was a lot I didn’t know, I’d only had a $9k launch. But I did it because my tribe were asking me for it. They saw me as an expert, or at the very least as someone further ahead than them that they could learn from.
Imagine if I hadn’t done it because I didn’t think I was expert enough?
I would have been giving up not just a future half-a-million dollar revenue stream, but my deeper calling — the work that I feel I was put on this planet to do.embrace bravery rather than seeking perfection. Click To Tweet
I’m sure you have plenty of stories around why it’s okay that you’re holding yourself back from chasing your dreams…
I’m sure you often feel like an imposter and worry that you will be ‘found out’….
But I’m here to tell you that you don’t need to be an expert to create your e-Course, and that you are enough if:
- You’ve been through something that others haven’t and can therefore guide them and mentor them
- You’ve got a unique perspective, a fresh way of looking at your field
- You’ve got a way of explaining things that no one else does
- You have your own system or process to do what you uniquely do
- You have special gift that people always ask you for help with
- You genuinely want to share your knowledge with others
- You have a deep passion or calling
- You realise that learning never ends and you want to learn more and more and share that knowledge with others
Then you can create an amazing e-Course.
There is no point where you suddenly ‘become’ an expert, where suddenly you feel like ‘enough’, where people will suddenly anoint you as their leader.There is no point where you suddenly ‘become’ an expert and people anoint you as their leader. Click To Tweet
Fear never goes away, so bravery must be our constant companion if we want to live a meaningful life.
‘Not being expert enough’ is such a common excuse among women, I think it’s worth delving even deeper into the notion of ‘expertise’ and what it actually means…
The amazing Tara Mohr (author of Playing Big) talks about the different types of expertise. She points out that while the traditional notion of the ‘expert’ is someone who has specialist knowledge backed by educational qualifications and work experience, there are also a number of other ways that you can be an expert, such as:
- Being the “survivor” – someone who has been there, done that and got the tee-shirt, you have credibility and the power to inspire and connect with your audience at a truly authentic level.
- Being the “cross-trainer” – someone who can take prior work experience or qualifications and apply them to a new area (such as when I took my commercial expertise in big business and applied it being a coach for mumpreneurs early on in my career or when I took my expertise in corporate live training and applied it to online training).
- Being the “called” – you might feel an inexplicable calling to do the work you are doing, even if you don’t have a lot of traditional experience and qualifications. There are countless examples of people who create amazing businesses out there in an area they were previously unskilled in. Many of my e-Course participants fall into this category – they have the strength of their convictions and passions and a deep knowing that they just need to do this even if the tangible reasons why are lacking. They trust.
Tara Mohr talks about the “called” stating:
“The challenge for the called is to trust their sense of calling. That is particularly difficult when they can’t find a logical reason why they’re attracted to a project, or qualified for it. The called generally feel that they don’t have what they need – and they aren’t who they need to be – to complete their calling.”
(From the article “Understanding how to frame your creative expertise”)
Trust is the answer
Trust is a key theme that comes up in my own business and one that I have to engage my participants on regularly.
For this reason I created some affirmation cards that participants in the e-Course Launch Formula can have printed and cut out that are based around affirmations for their success.
How would you feel if you were on your deathbed, and looked back on your life, and realised that the ONLY THING holding you back from everything you ever wanted… was confidence?
The confidence to try out for the school musical when you were 16. The confidence to ask out that hot guy at the bar when you were 21. The confidence to rock a bikini on the beach when you were 30. The confidence to start your own business or create your e-Course when you were 40…
Whatever your age, whatever the *thing* was that you wanted but were too scared to go after, how would you feel knowing that THE ONLY THING THAT HELD YOU BACK WAS YOUR BRAIN?
That’s the reality for the majority of women.
And yes, that includes starting an eCourse and creating the kind of income and freedom that you deserve. But frankly, right now, I don’t even *care* about eCourses, and this is so much bigger than just our businesses — I just want YOU to go after whatever it is that your heart truly wants.
I want us all to be examples to our daughters about what it looks like to stand up and grab life with both hands. Our sons are taught to be brave, but unfortunately society teaches our girls to be perfect, which as you know is an entirely unachievable state of being.
I’m standing before you on my soapbox today because lady, you can do it. We can ALL do it. And we owe it to the world to put the best of ourselves out there on display.
WHERE ARE YOU HOLDING YOURSELF BACK? WHERE DO YOU NEED TO STAND UP? WHAT ARE YOU TOO SCARED TO DO, EVEN THOUGH YOUR HEART IS TELLING YOU TO GO FOR IT?
If you are finally ready to step up and be brave, chase your dreams and recognise that you are enough come and join me in the e-Course Launch Formula and trust your calling in a truly supportive community.
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